... Putting complete trust in God for something and not getting it. Not only that, but seeing that people who don't believe in or trust in God at all can go after almost anything they want and get it. Or, people who choose to believe in God at their time of distress or in a time of need will get results or be granted some kind of favor in regards to what they were seeking. Yet, I am still stuck in my same position.
Maybe it's this attitude that still has me here. Maybe it's just a personal/individual thing and more is just required of me from the Lord. Maybe I'm just over-thinking this too much. But this is truly how I feel... especially recently.
This feeling does not alter my complete trust in God, but it does make me feel unimportant sometimes... And this is just how I HONESTLY FEEL.
However, Beau reminded me of the scripture in Matthew 5:45 that states: "...for He (God) causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous."
Also, Psalm 145:9: "The Lord is good to all: and His tender mercies are over all his works."
Hardships and disappointments can often lead to loss of faith, especially in the case of unanswered prayers. Unanswered prayers can seem like you're praying to a dead God. It truly can. But the Lord has proven Himself to me too many times for me to straight-up denounce my faith and His existence. So, I continue to trust. I continue to wait. And when that day of answered prayers comes, this blog will be one of the first means of sharing the news. Why? Because I know that faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God (Romans 4:17). My blog readership is very small, but I do get visitors from all over the world on a day-to-day basis. I want to be an oracle-- a testament of sorts that as a Christian, we have our share of ups and downs. We are by no means perfect and sometimes when things don't go our way (and there will always be a time in our life when things don't go as we wish), if we continue to hope in the Lord, He will smile upon us and bless our faithfulness. So, that is my prayer right now-- more than finally getting a job in my field... more than furnishing our home... more than not having to worry about finances. I pray that I will continue to remain faithful and that my journey may be an encouragement to someone else out there.