2015: Year in Review

I am not sure what it is about year's end that causes us to reflect, dream and plan. Maybe it's the idea of starting afresh. That start of a new year is a do-over of sorts. A year to finally get things in order. Maybe it is a sort of subconscious clock within our hearts, similar to that of the changing seasons, that there is a time in our lives for something new. I don't know what it is, but I think it is beautiful.


I remember entering 2015 on a bit of a sad and hopeless note. I did not know what they year had in store, and I was not expecting it to be great, since everything I seemed to have hoped and wished for in the last few years did not come to pass. It was not a matter of not trying. I guess those things were just not meant to be. I wish I could say that I have new dreams now, but I do not. I do not know what I want anymore, and frankly, I am kind of tired of trying. For the coming year, I think I will just keep my expectations at a minimum and see what comes from it.

All melancholy aside, 2015 has had some moments that have helped to shape and build me to the person that I am at this point. It has been full of first time experiences and character-building processes. The low times were not always low and the joyful times made my smiles big and my heart full. I am sure I will reflect back later in life and and think 'that wasn't so bad'.

2015 Happenings

27th birthday. what an awkward age! I guess it only gets more awkward from here)
Meeting my half-sister,Akelia, her husband and my niece. -- finally! we have been in contact on and off for about 10 years and I finally got to meet her. it was crazy seeing how many similarities we had.)
Weekend getaway at the Jersey shore -- it was so nice for us to get away. It helped to refresh us and take away some of the stress and tension that had been lingering. I think this is something we need to do more.
5 year college reunion. five years already! ... another reason why 27 feels so odd.
First car accident. major bummer! but no injuries and minor damages.
My brother-in-love's wedding in NY-- this was Beau's first time seeing his brothers and parents since our wedding in 2012!! It was also such a small and intimate ceremony/celebration. I really enjoyed it.
Expanded my photography -- I considered making it a business venture, but realized that the market is already saturated with really good photographers. So, I just enjoyed the opportunities that were offered to me. I was able to shoot a sweet 16, a wedding, a baby christening, and my dear blogger friend, LaNeshe, allowed me to hold a fall photo shoot of her and her adorable family.
Home furnishings. We are finally filling in the gaps in our home. This year, we paid off on our sofa, got a rug and a gorgeous wood TV/console table set. We even hung a painting in the dining room. Things are finally coming together. Little by little, we are filling the living room with pieces we love and I couldn't be more happy.
Our 3 year wedding anniversary. Beau and I saved up throughout the year and decided to go away for our anniversary in November. We flew down to Tampa, Fl and stayed there for couple days. We ventured out to the Clearwater/St. Petersburg area, walked the beach, drove through the cities, and enjoyed the warm air. It was a really nice stay for us. We are now thinking about possibly living in Florida in the future. The most special part of our anniversary trip was meeting up with Ashley from Ashley Holstein Photography and having a cheeky little anniversary photo shoot. The photos came out beautifully and I am so happy with them. This week was the highlight of 2015 for me!

Thank you for those who still check in every once in a while, even though my posts have been sparse. I look forward to sharing more of this journey with you all in the new year! 

♥ Jhan

lately... in photos

// Beau leading the teen class at Vacation Bible School 


// Family breakfast

 
//  My brother-in-love's wedding reception - very small, very intimate. Loved it! 


// Beau's birthday dinner

  
//   Classic Car Fridays in Havertown. Every other Friday during the summer months, a group of classic car enthusiasts gather in the parking lot of a shopping plaza to chat.

 
//   Banquets and disgruntled waiters.


// Franklin Fountain... old fashioned ice cream spot in Old City Philadelphia. SO good!

 
// hanging out with my younger self reincarnate. Rekindled my childhood love of roller skating. 

Snapshots of Myrtle Beach, SC

This was pretty much our view the entire time we were in South Carolina. It was a very soggy, dreary week. But as I stated a couple posts ago, it was really nice to get away from the city and be by the ocean. I think we would definitely go back to Myrtle Beach - most likely when it's a bit warmer, and more sunny. 

Our Christmas

This Christmas,  Beau and I spent at home together; just the two of us. We've been doing it for the past 2 years.  I admit that I often wish for a huge family celebrating that comes with much anticipation and preparation and reuniting with distant cousin, aunties, nephews, etc. However, we do not have large extended families, and we are okay with that. I prepared breakfast, and Beau cooked us a feast for dinner. (His teriyaki glazed turkey wings were delish!)

One thing I really enjoyed doing this year was wrapping gifts. I could not get enough of it. I've taken a liking to simple kraft wrapping paper, with bakers or jute twine wrapped around it and a cardboard gift tag. I think it added a nice look to gifts and it was my personal touch, you know?

We look forward to building a family and starting traditions with them in the future. But for now, we enjoy the simplicity of the holidays  and enjoying our time together as a family of two.

I hope you guys had a wonderful Christmas!

Love and Marriage

Life with Beau on this side of marriage (i.e. after the first year) gets increasingly sweet. Not because of some secret formula, but because of the love we have for one another and the effort to not only have an eros love, but to love like Christ loves us-- agape love. It is something I see Beau doing every single day (and he's really good at it too) and it's something I strive for to the best of my abilities. I admit that it is a bit difficult for me because I am selfish. Marriage taught me that. No seriously. As I listen to myself complain talk about all the things that are wrong, I realize that I worry about myself a lot. Like, a lot a lot.  But seeing how Beau steadily focuses on having his horizontal relationship correspond with his vertical one, I too would like to love like him.

And yes, there are days when we drive each other mad. Like, up the the wall crazy. Days where I don't feel like talking to him, and he's confused as to why we are not speaking. There are days when he annoys me and I frustrate him. We have those days.

But sometimes, in that same breath, we laugh hysterically at each others craziness and fall in love all over again... love on top of the love that was already there.

Because, marriage. 

ツ

Birthdays, Burgers and Things

We celebrated my Beau's 30th birthday on the 18th. Everything was kept pretty simple. I blew up 3 dozen balloons, strung them through the dining room and attached notes from 30 of beau's family, friends, and Sunday School students (he teaches the middle school class at our church).

I thought inflating balloons would be easy-peasy, especially with a balloon pump. But it proved to be quite difficult. Nevertheless, I wanted to do everything on my own so that's what I got for not recruiting help in that department.

Beau came home and was thoroughly surprised. It didn't take much time for him to find the notes placed between every other balloon. I saw a bit of tears well up in his eyes after reading some of the posts, and the ones from his closest of friends even brought forth laughter. There was no need to worry, after all. He loved the surprise!

We finished off the night ordering take-out from Bobby's Burger Palace. (I am not a huge burger person, but my plain "classic" burger was really good and very well seasoned... you know, in case you were wondering how it was).

On Saturday, we went had dinner by Penn's Landing with friends and tried our hardest to survive the last day of the heatwave.

 

Good times. 

ツ

Celebration Planner

I can truly say that event planning is just not my forte. I already feel really bad for my future kids. Beau's birthday is coming up this week. I have a few ideas of what I would like to do for him on our super small budget, but it's shaping up to be a little more challenging than I expected.

Sure, in a Pinterest generation, it is much easier to gather ideas and inspiration for planning any event. And, sure... I planned my wedding in about 2 months time.  But that means nothing when planning for others. 

Whatever happens, I say --- Awesome birthday surprise or bust!  I have a feeling he will really enjoy it regardless and that's what makes him the sweetest. 

//photo via

6 Months Married!

No one really counts the months, but I do. 

I would count the days, hours and minutes too if my mind could commit to it. 

6 months ago, I said "I do", and I'm so glad that I did.

Life with Beau is so sweet. He's so loving, kind and hard-working. 

Beau doesn't consider months to have significance in comparison to years, but I count them all. Every day is a gift. A new learning experience. A new life experience. I cherish it. 

I planned a tiny surprise for him today. I couldn't decide between cupcakes or a donut (tower) cake. I opted for the latter (since I know he has plans to bake carrot cupcakes this weekend) and added sparkler candles. I also got a little card...
It's the small things.
ツ

Happy holiday weekend, everyone! 

Enjoy your barbecues and time off!

A Few of My Favorite Things

 

 Tiny street in downtown Philadelphia lined with light-wrapped trees.

 Receiving a beautiful bouquet of flowers after beau had a long day at work. (You would think I had the long day. )

Adorning ourselves the tree with lights and ornaments in preparation for our first Christmas together as a married couple. (I was hoping that our tree would be too tall and cause a Dr. Seuss like effect, but it didn't quite do that wonky lean.)

Prelude to Marriage

This photo is one of very few I currently have from my wedding day. This photo, captured by my MOH and one of my best friends since high school, was taken as the limo whisked me away from the hotel towards the church where I would commit my life to my beau. 

Though it's a simple cell phone photo, it says a lot. As I sat in the limo and I smiled for this photo, I was such a nervous/anxious wreck. So many thoughts ran through my mind:  

This is dress is so puffy... I feel like a Gypsy bride (haha. no. seriously)... This unexpected limo upgrade wasn't half bad... Oh my goodness, we're almost at the church!... We are now pulling into the church parking lot... I can't wait to see my beau, and have him see me... Will he cry as I walk down the aisle?... This is really it, Jhan!... In a few minutes, you will be starting a new life with the love of your life... Here we go!!...

This photo says so much.

Closing Time

Bright and early Tuesday morning, Beau and I went to take one last look at the house we would be calling ours and then proceeded to settlement.
We now own a home!

Beau will be moving in gradually and I will officially move in once we are married. I can't wait!

One Year Ago Today

 

He acted a little strange. 

Looked at me nervously. 

Handed me a sweet card.

And, I said 'yes'!

Things Are Going to be All White

I used to watch romance films and believe that would be me one day. Then, reality kicked in and I realized guys can be cruel and everything doesn't always turn out like they do in fairytales and films. But after meeting my beau and experiencing how he loves SO passionately and SO hard... I believe again! 

Happy 3 years, beau!

I love you more than I could even express in a simple blog post. I love how you love the Lord. And I love how you love me. 

I look forward to the day when we say "I do". 

(Dearest readers, I guess this is my way of officially announcing our engagement. I said 'Yes!' on October 3, 2011!)

I Want Him

Dear God,

I want him, A.S. He is the one I want, Lord. I am extremely sorry for the forwardness, but this just all came to mind. 

In 6 days, it will be 2 years since the day he acted all awkward and nervous until he finally asked me to be his girlfriend. (2.5 years since that conversation in January where he said “I’m kinda feelin’ you, and I think you’re kinda feelin’ me too. Wanna go out on a date?”) That was not the most romantic way of asking me out, but it worked.

I want him, Lord. With all his flaws.

I want him with all the frustrations that he brings me.  

I want him with overgrown hair that he doesn’t want to cut until he “feels like it”. 

I want him with his talkativeness.

I want him with his greediness/gluttonous ways.

I want him with the funky glasses, and the weird afro growing out right now.

I want him with his Dickies, baggy t-shirts, … stupid, ugly, slipper-looking K-Swiss(es).

I want him with the tight grip when we’re holding hands.

I want him with the soft lips.

I want him with his big brown eyes, one slanted tooth, and one perfectly arched eyebrow.

I want him who cries when I hurt his feelings.

I want him who calmly deals with me in all my miserableness and anger.

I want him who loves me dearly.

I want him who loves YOU dearly, Lord.

I want him who’s obedient to his earthly and spiritual fathers.

I want him who encourages me to try new things, and smiles when I love them.

I want him who interprets ALL bajillion-million facial expressions I can come up with at any given time, and who laughs at my stupid jokes.

I want him who is willing to do anything to make our relationship work. 

… I want him, Lord God, who is strong enough to hear the woman he loves so deeply say to him, “I’m not sure I want to marry you”, but continues to hold fast to what you have revealed to him through prayer and consecration. 

I. Want. Him.  :-\

Ever dealt with uncertainty about your relationship? How do you hear God's voice in these situations? 

One of My Favorite Places...

The Schuylkill River Walk is one of my favorite places in Philly. Nestled beside the bustling Schuylkill expressway and behind the downtown area, it is a great place to take a relaxing walk on a cool, summer/spring day. At any given hour of the day, you may find joggers, dog walkers, or bikers in the area. The trail extends from the Walnut Street area, to the Art Museum circle. On weekends, you may also find newlyweds embarking on their post-ceremony photoshoots by the Waterworks restaurant, or families having birthday parties in a park by the art museum.

Personally, this place means a lot to me. My beau and I venture out here often to take walks, reevaluate our relationship, have lunch or just to hang out. Minus the foot traffic, I think it's a peaceful place to be. Beau even asked me to be his girlfriend here (photo below) approx. two years ago (July 2, 2009)!

There's never a dull moment here. There are always new faces to see, new activities going on, and different memories to be made. I love this place!